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Musings Episode 89: Convince No One…

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Sappy Sunday.

Happy.*

Happy Sunday.

Happy and Sappy Sunday?

I don’t know/care…let’s just start.

Musings Episode 89: Convince No One…

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Well….last week was exhausting.

I generally grow tired and exhausted when I’m required to engage in social contact that involves…people I don’t want to engage in social contact with.

So…when this happens, it feels like a battery that’s being drained and in desperate need of a recharge – I’m that battery.

There are also times when this happens that it feels like a battery that’s going to overload and explode – I am also that battery.

On both occasions, generally one of the exchanges that count as exhausting are whenever I’m talking to some egotistical slack-jawed junkslut – mostly in business.

Personal-life wise, I do a pretty good job of avoiding those types all together.

…and by “those types” I just mean someone up their own ass.

If you read my previous posts on ego and competition, there are a plethora of bad eggs like this in today’s time.

I’ve always been on the side of the argument that narcissism and egoism aren’t the same, and that in a world of this or that, narcissism is better than being insecure any day.

Largely because of the fact that when insecure people talk, in my experience many of them always seem to need convincing.

Convincing that they’re doing a good job.

Convincing that they’re loved.

Convincing that they’re a wonderful person.

Convincing that life doesn’t suck half as bad as they think it does.

Convincing that their friends really like them.

Convincing that their grandma (who’s been dead for like a millennium) really did love them.

They need convincing no matter how many times you may try to lift them up.

Don’t get me wrong – there’s nothing wrong with a little reassurance – but there’s a fine line.

With convincing, approval likes to tag along.

That is to say, insecurity often brings along the habit of a person doing things to seek approval.

Being a “people pleaser”.

Narcissists on the other hand, are interesting in the sense that they already tell themselves everyone loves them, they’re the best thing since sliced bread, and everything they do is like the first time something really useful was invented for human kind.

Like the lightbulb.

Or condoms.

They also obsess over being the best…which in turn, often makes them push themselves to be the best.

There are narcissist that are really just insecure people masquerading as narcissist (like Trump), I think, but that’s another story for another time.

So what am I getting at here…right – convincing.

Yeah, stop doing that shit.

It’s your life.

Stop bending over backwards to try to prove yourself if you already know you’ve made something decent or are making something decent of yourself when it comes to personal development.

Oddly, in several relationships across the board it seems like people need to be convinced more and more about different things.

Are people growing more insecure?

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Take business for instance. Remember the good old days where you just swung by a company, maybe sweet talked the receptionist into getting you a spot to see the boss, or walked in regularly and asked to see the person in charge because you saw an ad in the paper?

You put in your CV/resumé, you either got seen the next day, or same day, had an informal chat, and before you knew it you were hired?

There were no 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, interviews plus one drink-the-blood-of-a-goat final 5th ritual interview, just because they needed to cross-examine to make sure they were convinced enough to hire you.

There was no portfolio you had to present, no vague requests to “prove a track record of success” without actually specifying exactly what they’re looking for.

A guy looked at your CV, had a chat with you to see if what was on your CV wasn’t bullshit, and went with his gut.

There was an unsaid trust.

This amazingly managed to do just as good of a job as what recruiters are “trained” to do (but fail ever so miserably at) when it comes to ensuring people were hired based off of their talent or skills they could bring to a company, rather than nepotism or particularism.

Or for another example, take romantic relationships.

Remember when you could just walk up to someone, apologize for interrupting, and compliment them on something you really liked about them physically?

Or maybe you’d just be in the bookstore and strike up a conversation about a book you see someone considering buying and you’ve bought it before so hey great, conversation starter.

There’d either be a positive or negative reaction, you’d maybe swap numbers (home numbers, no mobile phones then), eventually go on dates, etc.

Once you were in the relationship, texting day-to-day wasn’t necessary nor was it possible.

The person just trusted that you liked them and them only, and when you both did call to meet up again, you valued it more.

You never really had to convince one another you were into each other, because each time you both met it was like meeting each other all over again – all due to a build up of the feeling of missing one another and looking forward to seeing each other.

Friendships are the same way. I could go on and on and on but I think you’re smart enough to draw up your own examples.

Along with a culture of busyness, of victim mentality, it seems like there’s a culture of a need to be convinced, which perpetuates a cycle of a need to prove, a desire for approval.

Nobody really says “prove it to me”.

Alright so maybe some business people do, but nobody really says prove it.

What are you, 5?

They won’t ever really say it because they don’t want to sound 5.

But actions speak loud enough to send the message without words ever having to leave the mouth.

I’m very much action oriented…so maybe this irritates me more than others.

But frankly, I don’t believe in people’s words.

Ironic, right?

A writer, who writes, and writes, and writes – but doesn’t believe other people’s words.

Well, maybe it’s a little more nuanced than that.

I believe people’s words, but I watch their actions.

I don’t believe in proving, don’t believe in convincing, and don’t seek approval.

I’ll take someone’s word, trust and expect them to do the action, and leave them to it.

If they don’t I don’t really care, because I don’t attach much weight to their words first time around.

I do believe that actions speak a lot louder than words, when carried out.

Largely because of the fact that as the desire from people, of people to prove themselves, to convince other people that they are what they are, can do what they can do, feel how they feel, and need what they need, increases…it only perpetuates the issue of words becoming devoid, meaningless – lip service.

Saying whatever it is someone wants to hear makes words’ value drop to absolute zero.

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Photo by MILKOVÍ on Unsplash

Saying whatever it is someone wants to hear increases the need for actual proof through actions to be carried out.

In people wanting others to convince them, to prove to them, whatever it is that they want proof or convincing of, it makes it harder to separate the real from the pleaser.

The true from the false.

The raw from the sugar-coated.

Which creates the theory that if people realized the weight of their words, the value of their words, they wouldn’t use them so superfluously.

They wouldn’t just spit off at the mouth.

They would think before speaking…and this would quite possibly restore value to words used.

Trust ties in with this. When a person constantly needs convincing or proof, they lack trust.

You can’t cure that.

You can’t make someone trust you.

It just has to happen.

So if you can’t make someone trust you, and they’re not willing to let themselves trust you, you can’t really convince them either.

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Photo by Simon Shim on Unsplash

If you’re someone who doesn’t seek approval, this can be pretty frustrating.

So here’s the simple solution to at least clear your head.

Just say it.

Say it to the insecure types, the untrustworthy types of people you may encounter in life.

“I’m not going to convince you.”

But only say it on the basis your words carry fucking weight.

Two things can happen.

They either will disengage in conversation with you, and that’s that, or they’ll realize your lack of attempting to use a silver tongue means there is truth in what you speak.

Stop pandering to insecure people.

Catering to such a frame of mind will inevitably snowball into our downfall as human beings.

Think about it.

Stay cool…

– Rego

Improve Your Lifestyle. Improve Yourself. This is Life. This is Rego’s Life.™

Musings Episode 89: Convince No One… is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

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Musings Episode 86: Give Back…

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Hope everyone’s having a great weekend.

Let’s just get started.

Musings Episode 86: Give Back…

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This week’s had me thinking about some things…

Last week, I wrote about ego.

This week, I wanted to expand on that but change the tempo a little.

I managed to watch The Philadelphia Story over the weekend. A favourite of mine but something I haven’t seen in a while…and something hit me.

We live in a world where a lot’s going on right now.

Not to say that every generation hasn’t – but let’s stop sugar coating – humans on autopilot have a habit of continually reaching all time lows before redeeming themselves by remembering to be “human” again.

Generally, it’s a few shitty people that make things worse for the less shitty ones.

We’ve got the shitty ones trying to shift things right now.

When it comes to this thing called life and living it, our chosen currency is a bunch of IOUs – fiat currency.

Everyone works for it, whether you’re working for someone or having someone work for you.

Entrepreneurs put in work early so they don’t have to later, or work outside of work while still being employed.

People who work as employees that don’t choose the route of an entrepreneur put in a lot of hours to build an entrepreneur’s dream.

To the entrepreneurs reading this, let that last one sink in for a minute.

If you’ve got employees working for you, who believe in you, who give value in their work and don’t shirk their responsibilities, who don’t mind building your dream, and are perfectly content with just collecting a cheque every couple of weeks or every month, it’s important to remember that they, too, have lives.

While some may not have the balls to learn to say “no,” don’t be a douchebag and work them around the clock.

Like I mentioned in an earlier post, employees are a flock of sheep, while entrepreneurs are wolves.

Both the wolf and the sheep rely on being fed, albeit in two different ways.

But entrepreneurs whose entrepreneurial pursuits require employees on a large structured scale (like a company)…well they kind of turn into shepherds.

If you’ve got employees, or a business that isn’t automated or built off royalties, you can be one of two types of shepherds.

The one that looks at their sheep like they’re there to sustain you – by providing wool, milk, and cheese.

Or you can just look at them like they’re dispensable and ready to be slaughtered at any given time for meat.

The latter way of thinking will feed you, but only for a brief period.

While the former will feed you, clothe you, and take care of you long-term – contingent on the fact you take care of them, assuring no harm comes to them that’s not self-inflicted.

You can see where I’m going with this.

If you’re going to be an entrepreneur, don’t be a dick.

Remember to give back, while building your dream.

Because ultimately, it’s your employees that help sustain you.

If you’re an entrepreneur without employees, still remember to give back to your customers/consumers, while building your dream.

Don’t always look for people to buy what you’re selling, but remember to throw in some freebies that provide value, here and there, on a consistent basis.

I think this is important.

While I’m not religious, I will say this is kind of like a sort of tithe – not to a church, but to the people who are taking the time out to take interest in what you have to say, do, sell.

This is especially true just starting out, but also important to remember to continue when you reach the success you want.

Don’t just run around asking people to pay attention to what you have going on – take interest in them too.

Social media is ironically not very social anymore.

You’ve got more businesses running around liking other businesses’ stuff just to try to promote their own products.

It’s one of the reasons why I made my social media accounts private for some time.

It gets boring having people write asking you to promote their brand – with no consideration of reciprocation or perhaps actually liking what it is you’re doing.

The world needs more collaboration – not favour asking.

Collaboration unlocks the potential to lead to genuine engagement – not forced.

This is especially the case when it comes to business to business, but even more so when it comes to employers with their employees.

Collaborate with your employees, especially with the ones who really show good work ethic – make sure their needs are being met just as much as yours. Make sure you’re giving them work-life balance.

And when I say work ethic, I don’t mean the ones that are constantly staying at the office late or there early – that’s not work ethic, that’s just putting their life into the company.

Stop the bad habit by disallowing them to do this.

And don’t think you can compensate them by making your office more “fun”.

Outside of work they have lives too – remind them of it.

This culture of busyness has everything all screwed up.

It used to be a sign of wealth when people had time to live their lives – now it seems like he who has the least time is most successful – don’t kid yourself.

You’re robbing yourself of life when you do this if you’re an employee, and you’re robbing your employees of their lives when you make them do this if you’re an employer.

Employees have to start recognising their value, and employers have to start respecting that value.

One more important thing.

If you’re an entrepreneur and you see you have employees who are entrepreneurial minded like yourself, don’t covet them; don’t hold them back; don’t refuse to hire them; and don’t fire them, if you see that one day they’ll leave your company.

As long as a currency system exists, everyone needs money.

Give them a chance to build their life, the way they want to, just as someone gave you a chance.

And when someone’s ready to leave your employment, let them, without malice or hatred – in the words of Enchiridion, we own nothing – and especially no one – in this world.

Appreciate the value they’ve provided you, then when they feel it’s their time to grow as a person, let them, and wish them well when they move on.

Give back.

Give back to your customers, your employees, your business partners you ask to collaborate with you.

The same can be applied outside the context of business.

Give back – to your friends, your family, the stranger that holds the door open for you, the person that says thanks, and the cashier that smiles and says hello when you go for groceries.

Don’t let your ego take over.

Give back by not being a dick – give back by being a decent human being.

As always…

Stay awesome.

– Rego

Improve Your Lifestyle. Improve Yourself. This is Life. This is Rego’s Life.™

Musings Episode 86: Give Back… is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

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“When you believe…

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Musings: Quote Wednesdays…

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A little mid-week inspiration. If you’re day after day doing something you believe in, whether it’s a sport, you’re business, a project, a piece of art, photography, or a new invention…believe in it 100% – and when you feel like quitting, remember why you started.

Believing in something partially, or doubting it, will only set you back tremendously. Start believing in yourself, and you can start believing in what you’re doing at any given moment – without fear, without hesitation, and without doubt.

As always…

Stay awesome.

– Rego

P.S. Quick side note – I’m gonna be posting a special today – a little Valentine’s “surprise” for this week only – fill out this form and start following my official site and get 20% off kick starting your online business with any one of the Silver, Gold, or Platinum website creation packages I offer, plus a free course on how to monetize your site efficiently. New and more innovative stuff coming up in the shop real soon…look out for it by the end of this week. 😉

 

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“Change your thoughts…

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Musings: Quote Wednesdays…

“Change your thoughts and you change your world.” Norman Vincent Peale

Our success is in our thoughts – so if you focus on the negative, the bad, the ugly, and the failures – you’ll get just that. If you focus on the positive, the good, the beautiful, and the success – you’ll get the positive…the good…the beautiful…and the success.

Always remember that.

Stay awesome. 😉

– Rego

P.S. – Go ahead and subscribe to my official site for a free eBook on How to Improve Your Lifestyle.

Musings Episode 19: Turning Bills into Leverage….? The Ultimate Cheat Sheet Tip for People with New Credit

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A lot of people shun new credit if someone’s in their early to mid 20s. Consider it weird…awkward….odd. As many may know, credit is a big thing in the United States of America. Not so much in the United Kingdom. So when someone wet behind the ears turns 18 – the first thing they (usually) get in the mail are a bunch of credit card offers – that’s how it was when I hit that age.

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Though some things did change when Obama came into office and the biggest recession hit in 2008 since The Great Depression.

I remember when I got back to the states a few years ago, and decided to finally get into the loop of credit – but like I said – a LOT had changed then. On the one hand it was great – because it protected the less financially educated people who associated credit with consumerism – on the other hand, for the finance savvy counterparts such as myself, it made things far more difficult.

All sorts of questions were asked and statements made,

“How many lines of credit do you currently have?”

“Have you ever taken out any loans?”

“There’s no credit history of you anywhere.”

“If you don’t have any credit history we’re going to have to secure double (sometimes triple) the amount.”

“Why haven’t you gotten a credit card before?”

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Question after question piled in, and after finally believing that I had no desire to really have credit cards, advice and suggestions followed.

“The fastest way to build your credit is to take out a loan…don’t pay it off early – pay it according to the payment plan until the very last installment.”

“Apply for a secure credit card – put your own money on it and borrow from yourself.”

“Get a few consumer cards under your belt – you know, places like Target, Macy’s, etc – spend and then pay the balance.”

The last one really made me laugh…firstly, because I’m not much of a consumer at all (especially not at those stores), and secondly, buying just to buy makes no sense to me. While the media pushes consumerism and teaches society to accumulate – I’ve always been one to take opposite advice – besides, I don’t like clutter.

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The funny thing is, though minimal – I actually had credit history – just not in the USA, but instead abroad. So for me it was a little like starting from scratch all over again, except with far more jumps and hoops.

I finally got one decent credit card, from Capital One. Starting out, I mostly used it for gas and the occasional meal, and would pay off the balance weekly. This made my credit history with Capital One soar – not to mention one insanely awkward time where they “blocked” and held one of my payments – on account of me paying the balance down too rapidly – to which they heard the far less calmer, quiet version of Rego.

After that small hiccup, shortly after they offered me a credit line increase.

I kept at this, switching my payment methods to monthly, never with a minimum payment and always in full, until after a while combined with calling up and asking when the statement dates were, I had nearly two months available to pay the balance – interest free. On top of that I was getting free cash from them as well with cash back rewards.

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Within 6 months, this doubled my credit score. While this was all fine and dandy, I wanted to accelerate the process even more – and then it hit me. I was gaining leverage of time, with money that was practically mine to use without worry of giving anything back in return – just on time payments. Forget consumerism. If I was getting time, to pay something almost two months later, interest-free, and making a percentage of my cash back – why not take it a step further and pay my monthly bills with it?

Mind you, things such as accommodation and utilities, I still paid off my own separate accounts…but things like telephone, internet, insurance, even business expenses, I could easily pay off of the charge cards – and did.

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There were numerous reasons why this worked out to be in my best interest:

  • Leverage of time
  • Money I could use practically interest free without touching my own, for almost two months (which pretty much is the same thing as leverage of time)
  • Cash earned on interest free credit I was using
  • Better, more secure methods of paying bills – using a credit company if need arose to dispute a charge was far easier and resolved more quickly than with a debit card
  • Ability to build a track record of using lines of credit and keeping them in good standing

Present day, I stick with three solid cards, and try to keep my balances below 33% – which is extraordinarily easy. So really, if people are taught to think of credit less as a consumer opportunity, and more of a business one – there are many ways to win – allowing a person to go after bigger fish, by building credit faster.

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I’ll give you guys a good example of an excellent way to build your credit, keep the balances low, and leverage your time on payments made for your monthly bills. If you take 3 cards, and split them into categories – business, mandatory living expenses, and recurring leisure expenses – you can get your mind geared towards clearer, more strategic thinking – and take your way of seeing money to a new level.

So let’s say you used one card for business expenses – i.e. if you have a recurring monthly bill from Blue Host or Host Gator for a website you have – you can put that on the business card. Business trips where you’re buying gas? Business card.

How about mandatory living expenses? I say mandatory, because with the way the world operates today, this could easily apply to internet, telephone, and auto insurance – staple things like that. So you’ve got a recurring charge that comes out every month for auto insurance – then you put it on the living expenses card.

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Pretty good at managing money but still can’t let go of that Pandora One or PlayStation Plus subscription? Go weak in the knees for Netflix? Alright – that’s fine, I’ve got a weakness for Pandora One too – so put it on the leisure expense card.

It’s all very simple. If you can start looking at credit lines and charge cards this way – you can have a great time all around – and literally be laughing all the way to the bank. Because paying a credit card bill won’t seem like a task anymore – but an advantage.

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I’m seeing green.

Just remember these 4 key things:

  1. Always pay ON TIME
  2. Always pay IN FULL
  3. Always keep spending CATEGORIZED and SEPARATE
  4. Always keep the balance UNDER 33%

I know the last one may be hard starting out, especially if you’re given a very low line of credit, but keep at it and you’ll see that quickly change.

Stay savvy 😉

– Rego

Musings Episode 19: Turning Bills into Leverage….? The Ultimate Cheat Sheet Tip for People with New Credit is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

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“The best way….

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Musings: Quote Wednesdays…

“The best way out is always through.” – Robert Frost

Touching a little bit on last week’s quote, this week’s runs along the same line. Sometimes, the best way to deal with things, instead of going around them by avoiding them – is just facing them head on – but always, always, think smart, and not hard. 😉

Happy Wednesday.

– Rego

Musings Episode 6: Leadership, Justified Anger, and Professionalism

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This week I really wanted to talk about main aspects of business where you see a lot of articles written about but rarely ever really discussed…it’s usually the cookie cutter version you see, but never the real side.

So I thought I’d talk about how the three points – leadership, justified anger, and professionalism all tie into each other, but are seldom used together successfully.

First off, let’s go with leadership. What really makes a good leader? Most would say someone who is good at giving orders and direction. Others would say someone who has the power of persuasion…and still others would say one who is quick at making decisions when a problem arises and they have to direct an entire team.

While all of these may be true, the other critical parts are kind of, shied away in the corner. What about leaders who show consistency? Resilience? Who are quick to make a decision AND slow to change their mind? Or, how about a leader who knows how to project the image of leadership but not the image of a tyrant or jackass?

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Many times, especially today, leaders are thought to be powerful and feared, with a sort of dictator-type presence to them…fear and intimidation are taught to be the defining attributes of a good leader, having everyone tremble when you walk into the room…pair it with a hot temper when an employee screws up or doesn’t deliver, and you’ve got yourself an office nazi.

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But really, when we think about it, it’s this type of fear that causes many of a leader’s subordinates to begin developing a smoldering, slow resentment or disdain for their supervisor, which can have more detrimental than successful results.

While the whip and sheckels tactic may have worked for some of humanity’s prior ancestors in the days of Egypt, what many corporations today don’t realize is that this kind of method can make a company lose tons of money.

The way a business owner, manager, or any kind of supervisor treats their employees or subordinates plays a big role in productivity, work efficiency, and morale…and frankly, I believe these are the things that are being sorely overlooked nowadays.

Sure, you may be able to get away with barking at Joe’s back all day everyday for a week because he’s the new kid on the block, but within a month there is a high probability Joe is going to feel frustrated, stressed, angry, and non-chalant about his job, and he’s pretty much going to experience a huge morale drop.

Joe also may become a tad edgy. Just a tad.

This kind of thing would then create a domino effect of decreased work performance, meaning more mistakes, less attention to detail, and even a “fuck it all” attitude towards any work that gets pushed Joe’s way. This ultimately leads to overall sub-par effort and a decrease in company profit.

The sad part is Joe could be a really great employee. I’ve seen so many employees who put 300% effort into their work get metaphorically kicked around and abused, or short changed and taken advantage of by employers who don’t realize they’ve hired a potential gold mine, if they just changed their leadership tactics…these same employees eventually give up, instead kicking themselves into “auto pilot mode” and giving at most 75%, feeling like work is a never-ending  spiral of monotany.

Hell, whenever I used to do hiring and even present day, I look for many things average employers don’t – and I’ll turn down many who try to kiss my ass on the first meet.

I believe employees should be directed as such: I like to make sure my hirees know responsibility, accountability, self-confidence but humbleness, and knowing when and how to stand up for themselves. I’ll treat my employees as my equal so long as it’s understood the respect is on a contingent basis of their performance and responsibility for their own actions.

They have to, have to, HAVE TO, be the type to own up to their mistakes without fear, or fear of judgment. Everyone fucks up sometimes, but admitting you did takes courage – and courage shows initiative – and initiative shows leadership.

If an employee shows me genuine effort – which doesn’t mean working themselves to the bone – and knows how to maximize time efficiency while showing independent thinking, I grab such a person and hold onto them by treating them as a business partner – not a subordinate.

Business Day

Because when you think about it – everyone is a partner in business, it’s a team effort. If one “gear” stops working or is neglected, eventually the whole machine starts having problems.

So I treat my employees as my equal, and when disciplinary action arises, enforce it. After all, whipping a horse so many times will only make it become numb to the feeling after a while.

This leads me to my next point – justifiable anger. So many employers nowadays look at aggression as a power tool, showing dominance and “who’s boss”. Little do they realize this type of controlling attitude long-term gets them nowhere.

I tend to think the opposite…because anger is a two way street. A supervisor could think that consistently seeming angry at everyone in the business is equivalent to running a ship with an iron fist, but what they fail to realize is that through the false anger – legitimate anger can materialize – on the employees side.

Jusitifiable anger can be defined by examples such as this: If an employer constantly barks at and criticizes the employee that is doing their work, as mentioned earlier, eventually this employee can, and will develop a slow, smoldering resentment towards their supervisor.

This is justified anger. The same way some employers who have administrative assistants, get the people who work under that job title to run millions of errands for them. The admin assistant may carry out everything to a T – but if it’s eating a huge hole in their pocket, eventually that assistant will begin to become stressed due to unnecessary financial expense variables they had not originally planned to come out of their wages…and by becoming stressed become irritated…and irritated then becomes aggravation, and aggravation becomes frustration…and frustration, anger.

When you have employees in this state, the power of persuasion is powerless. Hence why many supervisors find themselves only getting employees to carry out a task one of two ways – through forced command, or half-assedly…and they wonder why.

The funny thing is, the whole concept of how to treat an employee, or any person for that matter still boils down to the one rule everyone learned in kindergarten but always seems to forget as they age:

The_Golden_Rule.001

This doesn’t mean just being nice to someone – it also means when problems arise standing up for yourself, and expecting other to do the same.

Such a simple, no-brainer rule…yet still many seem to forget. Sure it may sound silly to some – but this rule can get businesses – and anyone really, on the right track and in line with the prosperity they’ve been looking for. It also makes for a stress free environment. Who doesn’t want that???

I highly recommend checking out All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, by Robert Fulghum. It’s a read you won’t wanna pass up.

Stay awesome.

– Rego

Musings Episode 6: Leadership, Justified Anger, and Professionalism is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

Musings Episode 5: Winning the Lottery – Not as bad as you think…

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Alright…so I’m not promoting any sort of gambling…but a few buddies and I had a discussion about what it’d be like to win the lottery. What we’d do with the money, how we’d feel, etc.

So the answers rolled in. One said they’d buy a big house, one said a Bugatti Veyron, another said both, and another said an estate with a golf course. While listening to all these answers, I was a little shocked and disappointed – until one of them said, “guys….what about after you buy all that stuff? What about maintenance costs? I know for a fact a million dollar beach unit can run about $30,000 in taxes alone – how much do you really think an estate would cost per annum?”

Alright sir, and your total annual costs come to....$1654649848465....and 63 cents.

Alright sir, and your total annual costs comes to….$1654649848465….and 63 cents.

She beat me to the chase…with a grin I agreed, and then asked her what she’d do with it. She then proceeded to list off business ventures and commodities she’d invest in, along with some other business ideas, and positive life experiences she’d like to have.

WOOOOO....!!!

WOOOOO….!!!

Usually, with the lottery there is a very negative stigma attached to it – there’s an actual statistic that states the majority of lottery winners lose all their money within the first couple of years and end up worse off than where they started.

But what I’ve found is noone really bothers to ask why such a negative stigma is attached to this gambling trend that is practiced by millions every day. They never ask, “why do these people lose all that money?” and never ask “how did they lose all that money?” Most people just accept the fact that, “it is what it is,” and feed into the stigma, never unearthing the real root of the problem.

The root of the problem is not foaming at the mouth from having millions of dollars, no…there was once a report of a man who was on public assistance for food and continued to receive benefits while still holding his lottery money.

The root of the problem is in fact much simpler than that – and it’s only four words – lack of financial education.

And I don’t mean the economic kind they teach you in school. The Keynesian economics taught is more of a joke than an actual way to rationalize how money works and why fiat currency operates the way it does.

The answer is many people have just learned to spend their money – never how to actually use it. They’re trained from kindergarten onward to do two things – buy “stuff” and work to buy stuff…then when they get to college (or sometimes earlier dependent upon circumstances) and go out on their own, they’re taught to “work to buy stuff and pay bills.”

The way the employment system is designed, the average person just meets the mark. They start out in school spending 7-8 hours learning – which conditions them for 7-8 hours of work when they reach adulthood. Aside from college where your lectures (or classes, in American terms) are staggered and you get more freedom of time, the average person is conditioned from age 4/5 to sit at a desk and build someone else’s dream…no wonder so many people are depressed or stressed out.

"When Cameron was in Egypt's land...let my Cameron goooo......"

“When Cameron was in Egypt’s land…let my Cameron goooo……”

So what happens many times when you spend 8 hours a day building someone else’s dream? You forget your own…but you still make money. The void one can feel is filled by consumerism, which thus begins the cycle. You work to pay bills, and whatever you have left over, you use to purchase “items” that give short term gratification.

They’re never taught about after purchase maintenance costs…matter of fact they’re discouraged to even think about it…and don’t even get me started on credit. Max out your card and then pay the minimum? Bull. Sh*t. The motto is “buy, buy, buy, and feel good…but don’t weep when the bills after the initial one comes”.

“Buy that BMW 5 series where they say you never have to change the oil except every 15,000 miles…but don’t weep when it gets engine sludge because we didn’t mention to only use a specific oil.”

“Buy that Ferrari Spyder, but don’t cry when repairs are needed.”

Those Ferrari’s are sweet rides, huh?

There is a belief in Europe. “Americans live to work, and Europeans work to live.” In my travels, I’ve realized this is partially true. No offense to any one nation.

So tying this all in with the lottery, we can understand to a degree now why people lose all the money they’ve won within the first two years and can be worse off than when they started. From childhood if their parents didn’t know any better, many have been steered in the wrong direction.

Instead of investing $40,000 in a string of automated businesses, they’re encouraged to go and spend $40,000 on a couple of Rolex watches and ridiculous looking rims.

This…this is how I get all the ladies…if I don’t run them over by accident first.

Instead of investing $1.1 million in solid commodities like gold and silver (no, not the kind you wear), they’re encouraged to go get that Ferrari Enzo they’ve been eyeing but thought they could never afford.

$15 million on a house by the beach? Or $15 million on something that could potentially bring you in an income of $30 million a year? Nope…still, some people will take the house over the business.

Why? It’s my theory that subconsciously we feel so starved from our real desires, the propaganda of the media and product focused companies/markets see this vulnerability and choose to exploit it…and they’re not wrong in it either – it’s nothing personal, just business.

So what do they do? They sell, sell, sell….through magazines, television, movies, music even, billboards, you name it they do it…and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it….because people buy, buy, buy.

They buy because in my opinion when you are so starved from your dreams or desires because you’re constantly pursuing someone else’s through your job, you can pretty much be assimilated to a guy who hasn’t eaten in a week.

It doesn’t matter if this guy ate superfoods at $300 a month alone on just the powder, ate caviar as if it were brazilian nuts, or ate lox and drank an entire bottle of champagne on a daily as breakfast. If he hasn’t eaten in a week and in his mind he’s used to and wants to eat 6 meals a day of only rich (and sometimes unhealthy) foods, it’s irrelevant and he’ll take what he can get if it looks appetizing enough.

So my point is it’s the same thing with the lottery. If the average population is used to having roughly 50-80% of their income go towards bills, of course they’re going to look for an outlet, whether it’s spending $500 at the bar on a weekend to “blow off steam from work”, or spending $5 million on 3 luxury cars right after they’ve won the lottery.

Their vision is clouded because of their surpressed desires. This is what makes them forget about maintenance costs and indefinite taxes…and the way the education system is set up, you can’t really shove the blame on them, they’ve been misled.

Four-Hour-Work-Week-With-Timothy-Ferriss

Where they can be reprimanded however, is not making the conscious decision after they’ve realized this, to go and make change with their way of thinking. This is where financial education comes in. Robert Kiyosaki, though slightly old school in his methods compared to Tim Ferriss, believes that financial education is one of the single-most important educations a person should have – even surpassing your standard academic education.

ycctbr

And he’s right. Academia can get you to a point, but if you don’t know how to utilize all that knowledge, or even turn that knowledge into a financial river of cash flow, and you’re still working away on auto-pilot with no destination that aims towards YOUR financial success, spending $50,000 plus on a college education really wasn’t worth it in the first place…

….because for $5000 a person who’s never even been to college but invested in financial education, works the same job you do, somehow travels or has more experiences than you do, and somehow ends up with the lucky numbers of the lotto and takes off like a rocket in starting their new life and beats the negative stigma of the lotto, just by making choice decisions and knowing how to work the financial system…has developed more value than a piece of paper that shows you made good grades at an institution that is a business within itself.

4-hour-work-week1

Think about it….

Rego

Musings Episode 5: Winning the Lottery – Not as bad as you think… is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

Musings Episode 4: Dreams, Jobs, and Careers – Parallel yet Perpendicular

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Earlier on I mentioned to you guys about a new business venture I’ve delved into. Long story short it has very much to do with working with a CEO of a medium sized real estate company that solely focuses on vacation rentals and extended stays, with a few regular leases thrown in the mix.

Don’t forget the long island iced tea.

To put it simply the guy is a complete mess, and just by speaking to some of his managers I could immediately tell just how much of a mess he is. Yet he’s not the focus – no, because real estate was one of his dreams – so really, he’s a happy mess. It’s the employees, I felt compelled to write about. For legal purposes, I’m not going to disclose any names, and all names used, if any, will be ficticious.

My focus on this episodic musing is really more or less about how people have dreams, choose careers, and work jobs.

Usually the order in which those 3 things are executed are sometimes switched around, and very often, the dreams are lost by the jobs people take.

It’s been my observation, that the cycle goes a little like this:

Pre-K through 3rd grade – your teacher asks you what you want to be when you grow up. If you were like me, you had 2 answers – Spider-Man, or the CEO of an awesome, company. Usually, as all teachers do, you get giggled at and are told that’s “adorable”. Others in class, may say they want to be a fireman or police officer, ballet dancer or singer.

the-amazing-spider-man__span

….fear my wrath.

4th grade through 8th – Again, your teacher asks you the same question, though differently – this time, she asks what profession you’d like to take on. Again, if you’re like me, you come up with multiple answers – CEO of an awesome company, professional drifter, or Spider-Man. In respective descending order this time, mind you. Again, she chuckles slightly, and says that’s cute. Others in class may still say fireman, police officer…or professional skateboarder, world renowned painter.

Weeeee…..

9th grade through 12th – Once more, the same question is asked – though this time, it’s “now that you will be graduating soon, what career path is everyone considering? It is important to know this and hit the books, as it is critical to know what college is going to best aid you in your success”. Again, if you’re like me, you come up with again, multiple answers – awesome CEO of a company, professional drifter, CEO of an automatic business and world traveler. Again, your teacher laughs, saying that’s admirable, but it would be good to start considering an ACTUAL career path, such as doctor, teacher, lawyer, etc. Puzzled you look on fidgeting, slightly offended and annoyed, as the options you stated WERE serious answers.

tumblr_static_puppydogface

………

Fast forward to college, and you find that 50% of your friends and classmates are no longer stating the same answers they had when they were younger, but instead now find themselves developing a pattern of either two things: switching majors based on which pays the most MONEY, or sticking with their major and HATING IT, but sticking with it anyway, because society says it pays the most MONEY…or, simply switching their majors out of sheer boredom because they honestly can’t STAND any of the bullshit society has fed them about college and career paths in general.

van-wilder-horizontal-gallery

If you notice – as time progresses through the timelines I have just given example of, all of these boil down to 3-4 types of situations and people…no, actually, just 3. We have:

1. The people who have abandoned their DREAMS and genuine desires to invest labor into something they actually LIKE – and instead pursue what pays the most…or as I like to call it – the first signs of SLAVERY to a FIAT currency and CONSUMERISM. Though they may say they are career seekers…they are instead what I call the true JOB seekers…and years later those 50 something year old dudes who drive around in Corvettes with their secretaries they left their wife for 3 months ago…hardly a mid-life crisis, more a psychological break…or both.

mid-life-crisis-little-red-corvette1

2. The people who sort of stick to something that they find they like, a bit…just a bit, but have a tendency to switch up or feel indecisive in their decision because of the sheer fact none of what they’re really pursuing is something that they feel a BURNING PASSION for within them…the type of burning where it feels like the sun is at the top of your belly button (or solar-plexus , but not in a scorching way…more like a warm, fuzzy feeling type way. Or…as I like to call it, people who have over the years, or are now slowly developing a “blurred” vision of what their real dreams are, and have lost vision again, because of money. Sometimes, I like to call this “slurred,” as well, drunken by the pursuit of money. Dependent on circumstance, this shift could have arisen from true financial necessity or lack (i.e. where no one has had their back, so they fight to survive, learn to hustle, strategize, whatever you may call it). These people, have the potential, to pursue an alternative career TEMPORARILY, in order to work towards their real DREAMS, while sticking to taking ACTION that coincides with their dreams…and not lose focus.

mohom

And finally…

3. The people who are so bored with the bullshit they’ve been fed by society, they switch up from slight misdirection, or because they haven’t yet realized the reason for their actions in doing so is BECAUSE subconsciously, their very inner being is refusing to work with their psyche, and hold true to what they REALLY want out of life, and what they REALLY want to pursue doing, having, and experiencing. There are situations where, these people have the potential to ace whatever they put their mind to or study, and bored because of it…because they know that while they’re good at it, they still want to pursue their real dreams.

Dream-Job

I’m excellent with numbers and organizing but I’m pretty sure I’d stab my own hand with a pen if I had to be an accountant for the rest of my life (to all you accountants out there, I appreciate and admire you…no offense intended).

So basically, we see that the usual routine of society goes like this:

When we’re young, we have dreams – big dreams – and no matter how crazy they seem to “adults,” i.e. being Superman, Spider-Man, Green Lantern, or owner of a multi-billion dollar lemonade stand company, we don’t care. We don’t care if adults laugh, because somehow, when we’re younger, we don’t know FEAR. We don’t know LIMITS. We don’t know DOUBT…and we don’t know FAILURE. ALLLLLL of these things are TAUGHT behavior. We were never born with any of them. Now you can finally explain to your mother about that one time you thought it was “totally safe to jump from the roof line,” and somehow, you still landed just fine.

stupendous

Then, as we progress through standard schooling, we’re taught mistakes are bad, limits and rules are mandatory, failure is getting the wrong answer or thinking the wrong way, which then develops doubt, and doubt develops fear, and fear develops adulthood…or as I like to call it – battered childhood…yet still, we still hold partially onto our dreams, and think that “okay, well, I’m not that great at this, but I’m still pretty good at this, so getting this type of job would be cool..I guess.”

Finally, we find ourselves even further subjected to the vicious cycle of “there is one answer, one solid way of finding that answer, mistakes are death, doubt yourself to avoid making mistakes, fear and get it right the first time to avoid doubt,” and so on and so forth. SO…what do we do? We then sway and spiral between dreams, career paths, and jobs.

Often, we freak out about jobs, because we want the right one, that will steer us on the right career path…and often, we’re so focused on the right career path, we lose focus of our dream…because really, in the first place, any “path” that we were to take…was supposed to lead us to our dreams. Society, however, through repetition  conditioning, and reinforcement, drilled into our head, that our dreams, are not what we think they are.

yikes

BUT….

With enough will power, some of us break this cycle, and KEEP OUR EYE ON THE BALL…and when we do, we avoid being hit in the metaphorical nuts. The pitcher we call life, can be paid to play dirty, after all. It’s whether or not we play by their rules…or our rules. Our rules, are simply keeping ourselves focused and knowing that the “normal system” of doing things, is far from perfect…because what is perfection anyway? It’s not perfection we need. But instead….

Discipline.
Will power.
Focus.
Drive.
Imagination.

These are the ingredients that make dreams come true.

These are the ingredients that make miracles happen.

Miracles do not happen by some haphazard drunken-universe chance.

Miracles happen when we stay FOCUSED on what we want, and can’t fathom it being any. Other. Fucking. Way.

This can range from the money you want to make.
To the things you want to experience.
To the girlfriend or boyfriend you want to have.
To the place you want to live.

It’s SETTLING for LESS, that fucks us over…and settling, expands far beyond the monetary sense.

So…we can have a job and a dream – as long as that job is a tool to work towards that dream…what I call parallel pairing.

We can have a career path, and a dream – as long as that career path is steered towards that dream…again, parallel pairing.

BUT….having a job, to steer us towards a career path…with no dream in the equation or at the finish line whatsoever? This is perpendicular thinking. It collides. You don’t get anywhere like that. It’s a bit like….well, it’s like riding the Yamanote line in Tokyo, and getting off at the last stop.

For those of you who have lived in Tokyo – you will know, that this is a cruel trick played on newcomers.

The Yamanote line is a neverending loop. There is no last stop. The last stop is the first stop. It is quite literally, a circle. So when someone says to you “just take the Yamanote line and get off at the last stop”…believe me…they are totally fucking with you.

Suckers…

The same way your boss fucks with you saying there’s great potential for you but shooting you down everytime you try to “climb that corporate ladder”…

Fuck the ladder.

Keep your eye on the ball, and take a goddamn helicopter.

Stay FOCUSED. The same way you stay focused at the gym. The same way way you stay focused when you try and aim for that 10-headshot streak trophy in C.O.D. Modern Warfare.

If you can do it there, you can do it in every aspect of life.

YOU have to believe in YOU.

Stay DISCIPLINED.

Even if you want to be built like Daniel Craig or look like Eva Mendes.

Stay DRIVEN.

Even if you want every person you date to be a 10.

Even if you want to be a professional race car driver.

Even if that dream is still wanting to be Spider-Man.

They have a technology for that now, too.

Stay awesome.

Iron-Man-Sunglasses

It’s what we were born for.

– Rego

Musings Episode 4: Dreams, Jobs, and Careers – Parallel yet Perpendicular is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

Musings Episode 3: Mobile vs. Immobile – The Joys of a Mobile Business

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Departing Manchester Airport aimed for Seoul, South Korea. Connecting flight in Zurich with a 3 hour layover. With lines plus security check, 30 minutes to an hour of net layover time. Met a nice old Korean couple and was offered Vitamin C while we wait. Perfect.

Charlotte, NC to Porto, Portugal, connecting flight in New Jersey. On the way to Jersey pilot announces over P.A. he’s been flying around in the sky for 3 hours, due to weather conditions trying to route a temporary landing strip, and we’re now running on fumes – “but don’t worry folks; I’ve been doing this for 16 years and will get us landed safely.” Thinking I should head to the cockpit and give pilot my business card for classes on “tactful speech.”
Two hour layover from Jersey to Porto – minus 3 hours of flying on fumes – flight missed. 16 hour stay in airport until morning flight and fuming argument with bag check guy. Horrible.

Miami International Airport to Nagoya Airport Japan, 24 hour flight with 2 connecting flights, first one in London, second one at Charles de Gaulle. 3 hour and 5 hour layover times respectively. Long but reasonable. From Charles de Gaulle to Nagoya, met an interesting business man from Hitachi Corporate on his way back from a business pitch in Europe. Exchanged business cards and went our seperate ways. Business opening – perfect.

In cleaning out one of my suitcases and re-sorting travel documents, I take a brief moment to skim through my passport book pages. Each one is filled with a memory. Some funny, some frustrating, some quirky….but every single stamp worth it.

Until recently, this has been my average work year. Now, it’s 90% leisure. What are the joys of a mobile business, really? Well…for one, it’s constantly an adventure, and an education. It’s still work – just on a different level.

A buddy of mine works in stocks and we were having this discussion over the weekend. He was explaining to me how he’d love to have a business where he doesn’t have to get up and sport the typical suit and tie look, and would sometimes even be content with a t-shirt, shorts, and sandals.

Then he goes onto say how he’d also like to not go to work the same time, same place, same road everyday. He likes what he does; hates the routine. He goes on to vent for another 15-20 minutes while we polish off a bottle of Fris vodka.

So I ask him, “well, what is it you really want to do?”

Pausing for a while, he responds. “Just…something where it’s not so predictable and I have freedom to sleep in if I want or, if I feel like getting up and going I can.”

I push further – “that’s telling me how you want your days to go, not what you want to do. What’s something you want to do?”

Again, he responds, “I don’t know, I like finance, and I like what I do now, but I just want to do it differently.”

“So you want to do what you’re doing now but without being told when to do it?”

“Yeah,” he responds, as if a light bulb slowly lit in his little head.

*Ding*

*Ding*

“So you want it to be mobile?”

“Yeah exactly,” he again responds now starting to really think on what he’s been saying.

“Then do it.”

“Do it?” he asks inquisitively.

“Yes…start doing it.”

“But, how…?” He asks again.

We then go about picking apart his thoughts and getting to the key points of what he really wants, utilizing “backwards goal setting,” as found in the book “The New Psycho-Cybernetics“. You can check out the audio version on youtube:

Backwards goal-setting pretty much works like this:

You mentally prepare a list of things you do not want to do at all, and call it the “I Never Want to do These Things Again” List. This could range from not wanting to wear a tie, to not wanting to drive more than 5 minutes to work; not wanting to deal with stressful customers, not wanting to have a supervisor.
You then begin to use your imagination (yes, if a 5 year old can do it you can too), to shop around for ideas about other businesses or careers you may have a liking for, but would NEVER require you to do the things you don’t want to on your previously mentioned list.

A lot of people don’t realize there are ways to make immobile business or careers mobile – or, “time-freeing,” especially in today’s technological day and age.

There’s so much time wasted in an office setting where most “look busy” just in order to please their supervisor.

This guy I know is good at what he does, smart, quick thinker on his feet, an innovator, mathematician, and forward thinker. Often he finishes his work and work projects well before deadline, then has to busy himself with other things so his boss doesn’t ridicule him for “just sitting around”…and it drives him mad.

Maybe if I break this pencil, it’ll turn into a make-shift dagger…and then stab someone with it.

Let me repeat that: he gets all of his work done, in 50% of the time his average co-worker does. Meaning his value is 50% more. In an ideal world, he could make 50% more than what he’s making, just by his work efficiency.

This is what he wants – he wants his work efficiency to be valued. He knows he’s good at what he does, and wants to condense his hours worked to enjoy life while being good at what he does – compared to wasting away 4 extra hours a day twiddling his thumbs and listening to people talk about their monotonous home lives.

 

Mention your kids again Tracy…I dare you…

 

He wants to turn his 40 hour work week into a 20 hour one – maybe even a 15 hour one…and you know what? He can do it. Easily – there are many ways to work remotely, in the finance industry’s subsector of stocks and commodities. Just as there are many ways to work your business the same way.

What is it I like about mobile businesses? If I had to sum it up in 3 main points, I could easily say:

Freedom of time.
Freedom of money.
Freedom of hybrid thinking and doing.

First and foremost – freedom of time. I’m not a morning person – I work better in the wee hours of the night, often cranking out my best work with Bossanova and crickets singing to me sweetly in perfect harmony with that one old tree frog and the sound of water right outside my window.

Because it really is easy being green.

Second – freedom of money. You probably think I’m talking about income, right? Well, try again…I’m talking about what you can do with the income not allocated towards (non)reimbursed business expenses (non- if you’re working a J.O.B.).

Think about it – let’s just say you commute 15 miles to work everyday, and take a toll road. That’s 30 miles round trip, 5 days a week. That’s 150 miles a week, roughly 600 miles a month, 7800 miles a year. Just for work. Throw in about half of that per annum and you’ve got 11,700 miles a year, 975 a month, roughly 245 a week.

Holy shit snacks.

What’s that, a tank of gas? $50, $60, $70? If you drive that Lincoln Navigator, keep adding. At $70 a week, we’re talking $3640 a year of non-reimbursed gas expenses – across the board, because let’s not forget – you can’t get a tax return on traveling to and from a JOB.

Well Timmy, it was good knowing you son.

Then let’s factor in oil changes, tires, air filters, etc, etc. All accelerated replacements because of that 30 mile round trip commute. Switch to making your career or business mobile and you can easily cut all that down by 50-75%.

Third – Freedom of hybrid thinking and doing. Your 8 hour day, is not an 8 hour day. Let’s take that commute example a step further – let’s say you go by car…or cab…or subway. Let’s think about traffic, people traffic, car traffic, coffee line traffic. You get the idea – traffic.

That 20 minute commute now becomes 40, maybe even 50 minutes. Add that to your 8 hour day – at 50 minutes extra, you’re really working an almost 10 hour day. Change that to a remote or mobile business, and commute time can be cut to 50 seconds – a walk from your kitchen to your in-home office.

Or your den’s couch.

Using my buddy as an example again, this is exactly what he wanted. He wanted to take every non-reimbursed career expense ever spent and put it into something he wanted to do or experience.

He wanted to analyze his trades when his brain was fully turned on, tuned in, and locked on…allowing what he considered the easy stuff to mentally be on auto-pilot during the best times he deemed fit.

He wanted to take the almost $4000 he was spending a year in gas alone and travel to Singapore – for a little business and pleasure.

He wanted to cut his 9-11 hour day into a 4-5 hour day, taking the rest of the time to hit the gym more, and finally map out and set off for that mini road trip to St. Augustine.

Mobile or remote businesses and careers aren’t about just being mobile, they’re about taking the dictation from another human being out of the equation and utilizing a more flexible, efficient path. Making the stress less, so you can focus and innovate more.

In my early days of being mobile, where my income if I wanted to travel relied heavily on photography and internet marketing, – I loved every moment of it. I would explore in the early afternoons and evenings, and do all my editing at night. It was effortless. Aside from the jet lag, check-in and check-out times, new locations, new languages, new maps, orienting and re-orienting myself with areas, I loved every minute of it. I was the ruler of my own time, my own money, and my own pace…I could learn more in months what anyone with a PhD learned in years….and I loved it.

There is a rapid shift that is occurring and has been occurring for many years now, and it’s one of many exciting things I have the opportunity to witness.
It’s my belief that eventually, the standard run-of-the-mill office setting will become obsolete. The reign of left-brained cubicle thinking will – and is – disappearing.

Mankind needs it, and Generation Y is beginning to realize it. We’ve had so many technological advances the mass majority has been put on auto-pilot themselves. Yet this is the perfect day and age to keep creating. Innovative people know this, and they’re seizing the opportunities.

It’s what Tim Ferriss calls “The New Rich.”

Mobile and remote businesses and careers are the way to go – to eliminate stress, improve productivity, and alter lifestyles.

– Rego

Musings Episode 3: Mobile vs. Immobile – The Joys of a Mobile Business is a post from and appeared first on Rego’s Life

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