I’ve been listening to Abraham Hicks lately during my morning routines and it’s given me the idea to touch on a subject that can sometimes come up in certain conversations. The audio that got me thinking about it I’ll be posting for this upcoming Spiritual Saturday’s post at my official site.
In lifestyle coaching – and even fitness consulting – sometimes I get clients that are so happy with their transformations they want to spread the word like wild fire. Which I’m perfectly happy with…but keep reading.
One client in particular (let’s call her Sue) lost a tremendous amount of weight through three factors:
- Reading my free eBook which I offer that teaches you about goal setting/changing your thinking
- Proper diet
For a couple weeks she tried encouraging her friends to try it out, to which they weren’t that interested. In fact, some of them stopped hanging around her. Keep in mind Sue did have some weight on her pre-transformation and so did some of her friends. When she realized they weren’t as into reaching the same goals she was, initially she was dejected.
She came to me and we sat down, had a talk. I had to explain to her that she can’t save the world, nor is it her job. Initially she was a bit confused – more or less on the “job” part.
“It’s not my job? I don’t think it is – but everyone should know about this, it can really help them! If I can do it they can too!” she said.
“Even though a person can desire something, not all the time they’re ready to actually take the steps in doing it.” I responded.
…and that’s the truth. There are millions of ideas, services, products, and ways out there people can be helped. Literally. MILLIONS. In fact I’m pretty confident there’s a solution to at least every problem out there on the face of this earth – but nothing, and I do mean nothing can be done if people aren’t willing to embrace, accept, and partake in the solution.
Think of it as a friend coming to you complaining about a problem they’re having. They talk, and talk, and talk about it. They talk about it until hours pass. Then finally, silence.
Now there’s two ways people usually handle this setting – they either talk about the problem with that friend until they’re both blue in the face, but may not necessarily find a solution – OR when their friend finishes talking, say “okay – now what can be done to fix/solve it?”
There are studies that have been done where they’ve found men and women communicate differently. Men have a tendency to want to get right down to it, assessing the problem then coming up with the answer with all other factors (like emotion) filtered out. Women talk about things to get their head clear, but at times don’t take action on the solution they’re thinking of.
Keep in mind these are studies – at times you can have that kind of guy who talks about his problems but then doesn’t really seek out an answer, then that kind of remarkable woman who cuts to the chase and gets right on finding a solution.
All in all, the focus point here is even if someone has a problem, if they’re not willing (or perhaps not even ready) for the solution, there is absolutely nothing you can do. You may coax and persuade. You may try all those psychology tips you minored in at college…but if a person isn’t ready for the solution, it’s not your job to force feed it to them.
The same way you can’t control another persons thoughts and vice versa, is the same way you can’t make them accept a solution.
It’s not your job. It’s not your responsibility. The only thing you can do is extend your hand – and see if they take it.
This is what I had to translate to Sue. No matter how much she wanted to help her other friends, if they weren’t ready for it, they just weren’t ready for it…and that’s okay. Every person has their own life, and free will to run that life they’re given any way they please.
Which is why in my audio introduction to what Rego’s Life is all about, I stress that exact point. I can provide the tools, the inspiration, and the motivation – but after that, it’s ALL YOU. The only thing I’m doing is giving you a bit of a push – and if you so choose to pick up momentum from that push, then congratulations.
But I’m not gonna “hard sell” anyone into improving their lifestyle. I’ve never believed in doing that. I will consistently provide the tools and motivation though – because it’s my passion. It’s what I love doing. I’ve found my calling, and in doing so, live a much happier life than I would doing something I don’t like or at a job I hate.
It’s not my job to save the world…it’s not my responsibility. Every single human being is their own responsibility.
The only thing I help do is start the engine and help you get that momentum going.
It’s all you…and you can do it. You’ll do it – when you’re ready.
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